Do you need online dating tips? Want to know How to Score a Date in 15 Seconds? What can you do in 15 seconds? Watch an Insta-story. Skip a YouTube ad. Swipe left a few times. Maybe it sounds too good to be true — but I know how you can score a date faster than you can choose what to binge on Netflix. You get 15 seconds, max, to make an impression with your dating profile.
But how the heck are you supposed to do that? In 15 freaking seconds?
The truth is you can’t. There’s too much awesome about you — or anyone, for that matter — to capture in a 15-second, picture-based elevator pitch.
So you have to make a highlight reel. Think of it as a fun, creative way to show just a little bit, in the hopes that someone will want a little bit more.
Here are 10 online dating tips for making the most of your profile. I bet you’ve already accomplished step one.
1. Find Your Platform
Choose three to try. Which attracts your target audience? What sites would help you diversify your matches? After a while, you’ll have a favorite and can delete the other two.
No matter how smart, sassy or thoughtful you are, bad photos = swiping left. Every game has a strategy, and in dating apps, that starts with photos.
2. Show and Tell
Before they hear your voice, hold your hand or make you laugh, they’ll see your photos. So how do you make sure you capture the best version of yourself?
Definitely not in a blurry group shot from study abroad eight years ago. Delete those! No one should have to Facebook stalk you to see what you look like without your sunglasses. And while your dog is objectively the best dog ever, if you’re not in the photo, save it for the date.
3. Work Those Angles
You are living your best life, so show it! You don’t have to grin in every photo, but smiling does make you appear approachable. Psychology tip: the left side of your face shows more emotions than right. Oh and, also? You have to include one full-body pose. Hey, if you want to see something in their profile, you should have it in yours. Put one hand on your hip, pop one knee and smile because that part is over and you nailed it.
4. Variety Act
Diversify your photos. Nights out give a glimpse of you all dressed up on a first date, and action shots get the most likes. So if you’re a skier, musician or competitive underwater basket-weaver, display that with pride. On the flip side, we all love happy hour, but if you’re drinking in every shot (pun intended) a man may wonder what else you do!
5. We All Have Baggage
Most people have their guard up when they check out photos. We don’t look the same as we did 10 years ago, and nor should we! But if you don’t look like your profile, what else could you be hiding? Put your best foot forward, and know that some people are intentionally seeking out your flaws, just like we’re watching out for theirs.
What They Read:
Now that your photos tell a great story about you, it’s time to invite conversation. Just like if you were meeting in person, this first impression should be light, fun and positive. Give people a chance to know who you are and what you want. And, oh yeah, do it in 50 words or less.
6. Break the Ice
People might like your pics but have no idea how to connect, so give them a great opener. It could be a story or quote from a favorite film (bonus points if they get the reference). I love that Hinge and Bumble give you ice-breaker questions, but you can add your own to your captions. The goal is to give potential dates something to ask you about.
7. Negative Nancy Is NOT Invited
Of course, you have your deal breakers, but it’s all in the framing. You can say, “Must love dogs” or “Stay away if you don’t like dogs.” Same sentiment, different tone. Who would you rather date?
8. Don’t Mention the Word “Player”
Maybe you’re tired of getting played by men who don’t want a serious relationship. Maybe you’re tempted to write, “no players.”
Lovely, that’s a waste of time and precious real estate!
Ready for the hard truth? No one THINKS they are players. (And those that do definitely are not!)
There is no reason to be embarrassed about who you are or what you like. Put yourself out there; it helps other people see if you are a real match and whether they’ll be a real match for you. Similarly, don’t lie about what you’re into. What if the relationship works out and you have to pretend to love MMA fighting forever?!
10. The Final Touch
Check your grammar. Check your spelling. Have a friend check your grammar and spelling. Have a friend of the opposite sex check your grammar and spelling!
Pop the Champagne!
With your online profile done, you can focus on the future. Be confident, even you can score a date in 15 seconds using these tips. Stay positive and keep refining your pics and content based upon feedback. Just remember that your profile represents you, but it can’t, and doesn’t, tell the whole story.
When you show the approachable, interesting and fun person that you are, you’re focused on making a good first impression. This doesn’t mean that you’re not being real, it just means that you’re saving your vulnerability for when it will be received with an open heart.
Take a deep breath, Lovely. your profile is gorgeous and a work in progress, just like you!
Diane, The Back to Love Doc