The love you want is possible
(Even if trusting others is hard, people often confuse
you, and you’ve been hurt in the past.)
I know it’s hard to believe that what
you’re searching for is out there
Tell me if this sounds familiar...
You want to believe that love and intimacy is possible…but experiences from your past have you worried that maybe it’s not possible for you.
You’ve tried to find a relationship that lasts but have been hurt and feel unlucky in love.
You worry about being trapped or smothered by someone else.
You’re very loyal…but have been hurt by partners who don’t reciprocate that loyalty.
Big changes (like a relationship) are very stressful to you, and you wonder if love is even worth the effort.
The problem is that you’re caught in patterns you can’t recognize–many go back to your childhood. These patterns are keeping you from the connection you crave. But it doesn’t have to be that way…
It’s possible to find a relationship that
builds you up instead of lets you down
Understanding your love style is the key
Imagine a version of yourself that’s secure and trusting enough to risk being intimately connected to the right person.
You have confidence that comes from knowing your unique love style, and how to leverage it for your advantage.
You’ve learned to avoid the mistakes and overcome patterns you’ve been stuck in.
You’ve healed from your past, and are finally ready to embrace more romance with strength and resilience.
This transformation is possible when you understand your unique love style (aka “Confused Connie or Connor”) and start to take action. The first step is this course (keep reading!).
Secrets for How to be Secure Course -
Confused Connie/Connor Love Style
Your path to toward understanding your love style and finding success in dating and love
Unlike other dating courses based on conjecture and anecdotes, Secrets for How to be Secure combines the best research-based science that psychology has to offer with tried-and-true relationship techniques that have worked for thousands of others.
Created by a trained psychologist (more about me below!), the techniques in this course get real about what’s holding you back. It’s time to change your ideas about what a healthy relationship is, and to learn how to face and heal the relational wounds from your past.
The result is an inner security that attracts deep, quality relationships and more romance.
Hi—I’m Dr. Diane, and I help people find deeper love.
As a relationship expert and licensed psychologist (I have an Ed.D. in Counseling Psychology), I’ve helped thousands of men and women find love.
One reason I love my job is that I KNOW THIS STUFF WORKS! When I worked at Stanford on numerous clinical trials, I got the nickname the ‘Bootcamp therapist’ because I learned to give no-nonsense advice and helped people improve their mood fast.
I also know firsthand the anxiety that comes with dating and partnership, and the pressure to find love that lasts.
But success and intimacy in relationships IS POSSIBLE. In fact, I used the exact same techniques and tools to find lasting love (with my husband, Lyle) that I teach others. I know these tools work because they worked for me.
Here are the key lessons myself and thousands of other women have gone through to find love:
The key behind Secrets for
How to be Secure are these life-changing lessons
What’s covered in this dynamic course
Learn what Attachment Theory is and why it’s so powerful for understanding yourself and others in relationships
Name It To Tame It
We have some tough talk about how your independence isn’t working for partners, why you need to change, and how to do it.
You can’t connect with others until you learn to connect with yourself, deal with complex emotions, quit shutting down, and start relaxing WITH a partner (instead of running away). To help, you’ll learn 10 Polyvagal tips for improving your vagal tone (plus the science behind what that is and why it works).
It’s time to remove any rose-colored glasses you might be wearing, dive into your family history, and get honest about what you experienced as a child that created your unhealthy patterns. You’ll learn to recognize areas where you’re underdeveloped, grieve what you didn’t get when you were young, and move on to healing.
We debunk your false beliefs that you’re the low maintenance partner (um…you’re not), and that other people are the problem (um…they’re not). Then you’ll learn why interdependence–not independence–is the true goal, and how to get there.
Taking Action In Relationships
We tackle the bad behaviors you’re doing (ex. Ghosting, avoiding, isolating) that are upsetting partners, and how you can do better. You’ll learn how to communicate better, how to embrace healthy conflict, and how to stop being so picky and intellectual in the ways you relate. The result will be you as the more supportive and empathetic person your partner is looking for.
BONUS! Session seven
Advice for singles
Stop being so damn picky, start believing that relationships are workable, and learn how to practice, practice, practice.
BONUS! Session eight
Advice for couples
How to finally stop the rejection and shame cycle and break through to true intimacy.
Rinse, wash and repeat
We review everything you’ve learned, and break down the steps you need to take (and repeat) to finally open up, connect, and find the intimacy you (and your partner!) is looking for.
Each lesson in this course comes with activities and exercises you’ll use to shift your patterns, break from bad habits, and finally heal from your past.
You’ll also identify how healthy, secure people operate and what makes them different. After learning their habits, plus how to practice them in your real life, you will discover the confidence to say yes to the love you deserve.
The cost for these life-changing steps is less than you think…
At $99, this course, and the inner security that comes from it, costs less than what you’d pay for one month at the gym.
I promise you won’t be the same.
Relationships and love aren’t a formula, and there’s no such thing as a “guarantee” that you’ll find your perfect match. But here’s what this course does guarantee:
That you’ll have the tools to confront trauma from your past and find healing
You’ll finally understand why previous romantic partners have been so confusing to you
That you’ll become more relaxed on dates and have fun (truly!)
You’ll have more confidence and better boundaries
You’ll understand what healthy, safe people do in relationships, and how to find a relationship with those traits
You’ll learn how to believe in the best in others, and say yes to the love you deserve
These things are more than possible—they’re within reach. Sign up for the course and learn the tools that get you there.
This course is for you if...
You’re tired of sitting on the sidelines watching everyone else find love.
You’ve been let down by relationships in the past and worry that you’re just unlucky in love.
You’ve been hurt in the past but crave connection and intimacy.
You have a confused “attachment style” which means that it’s difficult for you to understand and trust others.
You’ve tried to change things but keep experiencing the same patterns and problems.
You find yourself giving up on the effort of romance because being alone is safer.
If any one of these feels familiar, it’s time to take the next step. In four weeks you’ll learn life-changing techniques that create lifelong intimacy.